...and a reasonable Monday it has been. No hard crash or major attack to speak of, but a quick, smaller hit that literally took my feet/legs out from under me around 6:ish or so. Once again, who's there to catch me? CC. As she had passed by me and asked if I was alright, and just as I was able to say "no", she caught an arm and Missy came around and grabbed the other while Joshy pulled a chair to underneath me and down I went. This time I did not lose my vision but did have the brain-fog which is common with potassium changes, drops in particular. The got the liquid K+ into me very quickly because hardly any other symptoms followed suit. A matter of minutes later I could feel my body's muscles all stiffening up and becoming sore and angry. My jaw seems to be another localized point of susceptibility during the attacks now and becomes hard to move and open, plus, it just plain ol' hurts.
While I was doing my usual pondering and self-psychoanalyzing about "why this hit and like this" and she reminded me that today has been a good day in many respects, but it has been a very emotional day as well. It's not appropriate for me to go into today's emotional details, but in a general sense, here are some of today's realities: a friend is suffering and feeling alone, another is coming to the end of a very long journey, another friend and I have reconnected after quite some time, and also, we have some life changes ahead of us that will require intense attention shortly. No one thing from this list triggered the hit, but we feel that it was the combination of intensities that shoved the adrenalin into gear, causing a quick shift in the electrolytes and either pulling K+ out of the muscles or shoving it in (I can't really remember right now the order in which they all go, but they are all cellular dominoes that fall when tapped and they each effect the next. Wow; I'm wordy, huh?
One of the specifics that I can share from today is that I learned that there will be another HKPP Conference this year in October in Orlando, Florida. Of even more significance, there will be an internationally known and recognized doctor who treats HKPP patients speaking at the conference and he will be providing free genetic testing for those who can attend. Even now, as I reread what I just wrote, I sit here and wonder how in the world we could pull it off to be able to go, participate and then, make it back unscathed to a significant degree. We had planned to go to the 2007 conference but wisely realized that my condition was much too unstable to make the flight and conference work and worthwhile, especially considering the costs at that time. I guess I just felt that I should share that because, well, it's going to take immense prayer and discernment to know whether or not I, and my family, are supposed to go and then more of the same to figure out how we could even afford to go, etc. Let me also say that I DO know that God does provide and His funds are limitless, but I also believe that if we are not prayerfully seeking His face and His direction and listening for His voice amidst the sounds of our daily life, we can, with good and warm hearted intentions, mistakenly insert our own voice or agenda while waiting on His.
I've given much in the way of prayerful intercession needs and I beseech you to please pray for me, for us and for those alluded to, who are in need of Him, even now.
I don't want to close this out without conveying this; Gary, I love you brother and I miss you. But I'm looking forward to staying connected with you now; this disease and its attacks have truly opened my heart and my eyes to my family and my friendships in that they are more valuable to me now than they have ever been and than I can really comprehend. You are precious to me, Gary. Thank you for calling me friend. I'm humbled.
Foods today:
- Breakfast: several pieces of grilled steak, marinated w/o salt
- Lunch: a chopped steak salad with Romaine lettuce, garbanzo & beans (reduced salt), and TJ's low salt salad dressing. Included no salt corn tortilla chips from Chili's with some sour cream and 1/2 a tablespoon of Pace mild salsa.
- Snacks: 2 Cutie oranges
- Evening: a slice of CC's banana bread
- Drinks: 4 or 5 16.9 oz bottles of water [No sodas]
Ok, now it's time to be done.
peace-
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